For probably the first time in my life, I feel attractive. I dont mean Ive never thought I looked good or anything like that, my self esteem isnt that low. I just mean, Im finally comfortable with myself. Its taken almost 20 years but I finally feel like I found my niche. I have a good…ish job, Im in school, and I kind of have a social life. so heres to a new year and the best me I can be =)
i feel like punching a wall and crying at the same time. i kinda know why but i dont know why its hitting me so hard today.
at least i have music to help me… you guys should check out Something Hit, theyre pretty awesome.
i hope you all are having a better day than me
he found someone new and know that i know she actually exists, ive got a pit in my stomach but im not sure why. im kinda mad and kinda sad and kinda lonely… hmmm … time to move on i guess.
the guy in my econ class seems like a good candidate X)
OMG i <3 damian!!! i’ve loved him since the first episode of the glee project. i want his gorgeous irish babies lol k, im done bein a creep now X)
I happened to end up on Fox as I was channel surfing last night. Glee was on. I don’t watch the show, but something about seeing that guy made me hesitate pressing the channel button… Because of him, I ended up watching the entire episode.
RORY FUCKING FLANAGAN. Your Irish accent is so UNNFFFFFFFFFF~
youre angry enough to punch someone in the face, but you know, even if they were standing in front of you right now, you wouldnt because youd be too busy falling for them all over again -.-
I wrote this in class today, right around noon:
My hands won’t type. My stomach is churning. My head is in a fog. I can’t focus. Something about socialism in Germany. I need to draw, to sing, to artistically occupy myself. I want to go hug him. Three texts and I can tell he’s hurting. I wish I could help, could show him how amazing he is. My best friend is hurting and it’s killing me. It’s aggravating! I hope he knows I’m here for him and can feel that I care. Carrion my friend, carrion and know you are loved. You inspire me every day to feel deeper, to love harder, to embrace myself, and to never accept anything less than what I deserve. I wish you could do that for yourself. You deserve the best in life and, one day, you’ll get it. You’ll get the wife and kids and home full of love. But it’s not going to happen tomorrow, this week, or even this month. Be patient, you’re still young. This ended up being more of a rambling, but I hope you get the point. You are loved and cared for. Remember that and you’ll make it through. I love you kid… never forget that.
and now, just hours later, i get home and check on him:
and after all that, he figured it out all by himself. he never ceases to amaze me. i always say that im the one who cares more than i should, but he does more than that. he reaches into the world and touches the hearts of the unloved. i think God put him on this earth to love and inspire those who need it most. so, please, dont ever stop.
Hm, this actually seems pretty accurate.
Though quiet on the outside, you are often the hidden hero; someone who rushes in when needed and then after the emergency is over fades back into the woodwork. Because of this sense of duty and honor, you can also on occasion be rigid in your viewpoint and unyielding in the face of other ways of thinking. Usually cynical and rarely trusting of others, you maintain a small set of intimate friends. These bonds are stronger than most. You are always grounded in the present moment. Your close bonds can also lead to clique-ishness and a tendency to gossip about those who are deemed less worthy. You are an integrative thinker, collecting data from a wide range of sources and applying it to your worldview. You can become overly task-oriented. In stressful situations you often withdraw from the world to seek peace in contemplation. You often seem cold and withdrawn. Often you will withdraw rather than verbalize your discontent.
beillore: